1000 petals by axinia

the only truth I know is my own experience

Expecting to Fly (Book): exciting spiritual experiences January 26, 2012

As I mentioned earlier in my posts, I read little nowadays. I used to read a lot in my childhood and youth but then got fed up with books. I wanted my real experiences instead of someone else’s wise or stupid ideas. Today I try to pick up true jewels for I have no time for just good things.

A book “Expecting to Fly” is one of such diamonds. The rare beauty of it lays in the fascination and depth of author’s experiences. Yes, it is all about experiences on the seeking path. Ultimately it is all what really makes sense I belive.

The book “Expecting to Fly” is autobiographical, Patrick Sheridan is a classical seeker from the 60- 70-s with heavy alcohol and drug background. I found it an intriguing read to learn about his journey which came out to be quite spiritual. This was all totally unfamiliar to me. I always had  a natural dislike for all kinds of chemical substances like cigarets, alcohol and drugs  – never tried and never wanted them. I have been that kind of intellectual seeker who searched for Truth only on the mental level. Ultimately I found out that the Truth is something beyond the mind and can be experienced rather mundane even as a physical sensation…Yes, generally my seeking approach was of a totally different art than that of Patrick. That is why I was keen on reading about some different experiences which led a great seeker to – surprise, surprise! – the same Truth.

The author depicts his life beginning with childhood, stept by step unfolding his seeking nature. The excessive drinking and drug consume of his youth are quite impressive – although there are lots of people practicing it too, I find it remarkable to read that someone has done all that and is still alive and flourishing…trully amazing. The author stated that in fact it was his drug experiences (in particular LSD) which let him first experience the high state of consciousness and realize that there is something beyond the reality we think we live in. The LSD trips had such an impact on the author that the descriptions of it could almost be taken for a drug advertisement. However later on he admits that the occasional highs are leading nowhere because of lack of system behind and dramatic health and subtle system damage. (more…)

 

The top 10 of my strenghts January 3, 2012

It’s time for introspection. Let’s see what we have here. I suggest introspecting on strengths, not on weaknesses. Here is my list. 

1. I am forgiving. Or better to put I have no issue of forgiving because I never feel offended. This such a relaxing point for my brain: I do not hang on any person or situation.

2. I am giving and sharing.  Presents, attention, time…just love doing it!

3. I love people, this means I love to meet, to take care, to enjoy, to support, I took sincere interest in their lives.

4. I live in the present. I enjoy whatever I am doing at the moment. And I do it with dedication, keeping my full attention on the action. This brings great results. Seldom do I think of the past or future, this is not interesting for me.

5. I am self-disciplined. I am very determined as far as my tasks are concerned. At the same time I never set up any goals and never think of what I want to achieve in the future. Whatever comes my way I just follow and fulfill.

6. I manage things fast and in high quality, trying to fix every task as soon as it arrives. I know that procrastination is a tricky thing and once delayed something, it is hard to get on track with it. (more…)

 

I believe that desires…do not exist! December 23, 2011

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There is a huge modern trend in the West, a trend to desire. Various psychological and pseudo-spiritual practices tell you that you only have to desire (put a picture of your desirable object on your wall, dream about it, etc) and with the time your thoughts will “attract” the thing you desire. And- yes! -for many people who try this method out it comes true.

Little do they think that this “works” probably due to some totally different rule…

Typical for the western ego-oriented mind we tend to think that the world runs around us. A very self-centred thinking. When step aside of that idea and take a look at he bigger picture, we can see a different image.

We can see that we all act in a huge cosmic play, according to a certain plan. There is scenario for everyone, every role is predestined. The only question is how good we are able to play our roles.

Since my early youth I have been trying to understand how this whole thing works. I have been watching and analyzing the events in my and other’s lives. And the conclusion I came to is the following. (more…)

 

How to meditate: a greate piece of advice and a terrific experience August 15, 2011

image by axinia

This is an amazing story I have got from a friend who is practising Sahaja meditation. However the coolest thing about it is that this meditation technique can be applied apart from any spiritual practice, for it works perfectly FOR EVERYONE, especially for those who find it difficult to meditate. There is no strain about it, no concentration is needed and yet it gives you the perfect effect of thoughtless awareness/mental silence, the true goal of any meditation…

Here is the story: Please read, try it out and share your experiences!

“I had a pretty interesting experience last year I’d like to share. Back in 1996 I was lucky enough to travel to Hong Kong with Shri Mataji and one morning when all the yogis were out, she called me in and said, ‘I’ll teach you how to meditate.’ I was quite excited by this…face to face with my Guru, learning the art of silence directly from her.

‘Just watch your thoughts’, she said. To watch them, she added, your attention peels away from the thought process and the two waves (the thought wave and the attention wave) hit each other and cancel out (reverse oscillation she called it).

Then the vilambha state begins. She said that you can do this anytime…driving your car, washing the dishes and you can be in total detached silence.

… It worked amazingly well. I was able to hold the thoughtless state for as long as I liked.

Now, cut to last year and I was going through a tough time at work. I really lost my cool a lot and was as undetached as you can get (sorry to say). The crunch came when my boss, a hard living, heavy drinking, chain smoking English guy told me to be detached! (more…)

 

What does Jesus Christ mean to you? April 25, 2011

 

I grew up as an atheist and considered any church building to be merely an object of architecture. I must admit that seeing Christ’s images on icons never arose any feeling in me (and actually who said that he really looked like that?). Neither was I impressed by the story of him. I tried to read the Bible at 18 and could not make more than 10 pages, found it too boring and wired.

Obviously I felt no connection and saw no importance of the amazing figure of Christ… untill I took to Sahaja Meditation. When my Kundalini was awakened, I learned on my central nervous system how the whole  Spirituality is reflected within and what the impact of every spiritual leader/founder of a religion has on my own subtle body.

When I take the name of Christ or say his prayer “Our Father” the tension removes from my head and I can feel how the Kundalini pierces through the Agnia chakra (on my forehead). One of the most powerful Christ’s messages was Forgiveness and same effect I feel when I just say “I forgive”.

This is how I know what Jesus really means to me. I know it not from books or preachings, but simply from my own spiritual experience. His message and subtle work seems to have installed some precious qualities in our collective body and it works in each and everyone either we are aware of that or not. (more…)

 

A way out of depression February 4, 2011

image by axinia

Depression, the greatest soul plague of modern humans… I wonder is it really a modern phenomenon or it is just better documented nowadays that in earlier centuries?

What defines depression? It is the act of depressing and the condition of being depressed. Depression is characterized by lack of activity, self-worth, dejection, sad feelings, gloom and inadequacy. When the people are in depression, then their life becomes negative. People in depression often face hopelessness, passivity, indecisiveness, suicidal intentions, loss of appetite, weight loss, sleeping disorders.

Here are some statistics on depression:

  • Main reasons of depression in men are separation after marriage, widowed, divorce
  • In US nearly 7 million women are clinically depressed
  • One in seven men will develop depression within 6 months of becoming unemployed
  • Mostly 15 percent of women suffering from severe depression will commit suicide
  • Nearly 10 percent of women experience postpartum depression after birth of a child
  • 2003 National Comorbidity Study, sponsored by the National Institutes of Health 16% of the population that is nearly 35 million Americans suffer from severe depression
  • in Austria: every 5th person is clinically depressed and under medication

I guess the statistics on other countries will be not much different. By simply observing that one can get depressed!

Although I am not an expert on this subject,  I would like to share one unique experience I had about being depressed. May be it will help someone out. (more…)

 

Meditation is (my) basic need January 20, 2011

A traditional list of immediate “basic needs” is food (including water), shelter, and clothing. Since years a meditation has become another basic need for me. I mean that. Meditation is something I cannot do without, just because it’s a natural physical requirement. It is not only the fact that I feel good after any meditation, but – what’s really fascinating! – that my body itself creates a demand for a meditation even if I manage to “skip” it due to the so-called lack of time.

I am practicing sahaja meditation  for 15 years by now and through that time I have noticed an interesting phenomenon: if I happen to miss my morning meditation, my body itself “creates” it!  This works the following way: when my body realises that neither at 8, 9 or 10 o’c clock in the morning I will have a chance to meditate, at the latest around midday (but never at the same time) my Kundalini starts rising stronger and stronger along my spinal cord, shooting out on top my head which creates the cool breeze above my head and I just literary fall into the meditative state because the bliss coming down my brain from above is just so amazing and relaxing that I cannot resist meditation for several minutes…

This happens totally without my thought about it and any effort on my side, naturally wherever I am at the moment – in the bus, in the office, at home… It feels like a huge portion of living energy is being poured down on me and I get a great energetic supply for the rest of the day. Isn’t it a wonder?

Basically all that happens without any concern of my mental self, a demand for meditation created by my own body and Spirit. Thus for me it became another basic need.

And I am sure I am not the only one with such experience.

Here is a short animation on how it apparently looks like:

LOVE

axinia

 

 
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