The secret of my self-confidence May 17, 2012

I was often told that one of the most fascinating things about me is the refreshing self-confidence. Some readers consider this blog interesting mostly because of that – the way I share my experiences, the self-confident straightforwardness which does not make others feel guilty is what apparently makes my blog attractive.

Some people ask me about the secret behind this quality:  How can I be so self-confident and at the same time not going into ego , the border is very fine as we all know…It’s time to reveal the secret!

I guess there are two things that make it:

1. I know myself very well. Since I was a child I was busy with discovering who I am, what my strengths and weaknesses are, I have always been introspective and seeking. This brought me a great advantage – the AWARENESS. I am aware of what I am. I know very well what makes my personality and what is still to improve. I know well what I am bad at. Or good at. This AWARENESS is what makes me confident.

But this is not enough! There is the second part of it which is quite rare in people, at least in the West.

The decoding of mysterious Russian soul December 30, 2010

I came across an interesting study revealing the part of the Russian soul’s mystery: although looking ever-suffering, in fact Russians are tend to be less depressed than the Westerners. The study gives an explanation why.

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Study co-author Igor Grossmann, a doctoral candidate in psychology at the University of Michigan, said in a university news release, “our study suggests that Russians are actually less likely than Americans to be depressed.”

“Among Westerners, focusing on one’s negative feelings tends to impair well-being, but among Russians, that is not the case,” Grossman stated.

Grossman explained that Americans tend to dwell more on past experiences and negative feelings than Russians do. The Russian people are able to distant themselves much better from these emotions than Americans.

Grossmann and co-author Ethan Kross, a University of Michigan assistant professor of psychology, published their findings in the August issue of Psychological Science.

Grossmann and Kross reported on two studies, funded by the U.S. National Institute of Mental Health:

I am not guilty! May 8, 2007

 photo by axinia

Feeling guilty is one of the most popular problems in the Western world (not sure about the East, would be great to hear some opinions). If you keep saying “sorry” – you are in the boat!

In the Christian tradition the feeling of guilt has been forced on the poor believers as a kind of an obligation. Being a woman, for example is a sin itself, they taught. Even if it was not the message of Christ – who was the compassion personified!- still it was a handy tool to control the “sheeps”.

The myth of guilt is rooted deeply in the collective consciousness, but it is only a myth. In fact, your true self – which is the reflection of the Divine – is never guilty. It is only if you act under the spell of the ego or conditioning you commit mistakes which give you the reason to feel guilty. In fact if is only the matter of wrong identification!

Feeling guilty is convenient, one can easily hide behind this pretty excuse. Suppose you have done something wrong – no sense in going around and moaning about it. There are two healthy ways to get out of it: