Is marriage really made in heaven? March 25, 2012

Five years back, being still newly married (2 years) I wrote an article MARRIAGE: MADE IN HEAVEN. At that time I was delighted about being married and enjoyed every bit of it. Here are some abstracts from the post, but please do read the full version.

“Guess why somebody’s marriage gets people around so excited? Why a wedding ceremony is regarded as the most beautiful celebration in all the cultures, among all the nations? Even though the voices for “free love” are rising high, We can not cheat the collective consciousness, subconsciousness and unconsciousness of humanity – the institution of marriage is obviously not human, it is DIVINE…  

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Second brain

The common mistake of modern times (as we are being well brain-washed) is that  it is the heart that shows you your life-partner. Very seldom it is the case. Naturally it should not be the heart, but actually your stomach! The key word s of a married life are sustenance, wellbeing, satisfaction, home – referring to our subtle centers they all belong to the 3rd one, in the middle of a body. Scientifically seen it is a place of a “second brain” as well. Meeting your life partner you should feel very comfortable in your stomach. Relaxed. Safe…  

Love

And the love? It can come later… In fact the true love always comes later! It is so easy to fall in love with many people (happens to me all the time as I love people, every single soul is such a precious treasure, diamond flower!)… People are made by and for love. For loving each other, all of us. Only when it gets romantic, it is very misleading and confusing – and the folk’s wisdom calls it “falling” in love. In the western society where people believe in love-marriage we have up to 60% divorces! – A good sign of the reliability of this concept.

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Blossoming out 

Last but not least indicator is your appearance. Our true being always shines (or darkens) through: no way to hide anything behind make up or smart clothing! Naturally after getting married to the right person you will find yourself blossoming out even physically.

The birthday of an angel: a fascinating life story! November 18, 2010

In this life I am extremely lucky with my close relatives and friends – they all are amazingly beautiful human beings and at some point I can’t keep myself from paying them my tribute (see my earlier posts on my mother, father, husband, best friend).

Today is my beloved sister’s birthday and I would love to use this opportunity to tell you the story of her life.

You may ask me what is so remarkable in the life of a young woman? Has she suffered a lot, got into “stories”, changes 10 husbands, got from poor to rich and then back like in a bad novel? No, no. From the narrative point of view – nothing, there are stories of people who are much more captivating than any novel. It’s not the case here. The fascination of Tatiana’s story for me is in its evidence for a living transformation which is possible through the light of the Spirit.

As a child Tatiana was a rather mediocre girl with no special talents and qualities, sometimes greedy, sometimes even mean. In this photo of her as a child you can see that she was not that open and even somehow mistrustful…Really not an angel.

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Being an ordinary girl, she was not interested in anything special, and not at all in spirituality.

However having a seeker like me in the family, it was  probably logcal for her to get attracted to spiritual seeking and when one day I came and told her: “Tanya, I think I HAVE FOUND IT!” she immediately wanted to join me. That’s the way we came to the fascinating Sahaja Yoga practice 15 years back. We were young and had lots of fun about doing meditation and discovering new opportunities, new sensations, new awareness and gradually the new life dimension.

 By this time she went for musical studies and had rather a boring voice and no evidence for it improvement. All of a sudden Tatiana’s voice opened up and she started singing like never before!After several months of Sahaja mediation practise her voice has dramatically improved. Even her teachers were wondering what happened… And that was just a beginning!

Highly insightful: why it’s so hard to become happy, what is dramatically wrong in our child-care and how to overcome it June 23, 2010

There are very few books that can deliver some truly fresh, insightful information. Most of the things have been repeated for ages. One of this rare, uniquely insightful books is “The Continuum Concept: In Search of Happiness Lost” by Jean Liedloff. (1975)

 

Jean Liedloff, an American writer, spent two and a half years in the South American jungle living with Stone Age Indians. The experience demolished her Western preconceptions of how we should live and led her to a radically different view of what human nature really is.

And that is:

• the aggressiveness is NOT in a human nature, and even children may never fight! “Not only did they not fight, they never even argued. This is not at all what we have been taught human nature is — boys will be boys. So I thought well maybe, boys won’t be boys.”
• every human being is born as a happy, confident, stable personality. “Society is unpleasant, dangerous, unhappy, alienated, and unstable because in childhood our nature — being confident, joyous and loving — has been undermined and we simply live the way we are expected to. What we believe is what we make our experience into. And what we believe is what we have been taught to believe by our parents and our experiences.”

Jean Liedloff claims that it all our problems can be traced back to the general misconduct of child-care and upbringing. We’ve got disconnected to the natural/true method ages ago, no wonder the evolution has taken a somewhat weong track…

She discovers that the basic difference in what the indigenous people do and we don’t – is the so called “in-arms period”: from the birth till the baby starts crawling, a mother carries it 24 hours a day on her body (including sleeping in one bed). A child gets an enormous dose of security and happiness, since there is nothing more important and beautiful for it than the mother.

 

 Let’s have a look at the common practice in the modern Western childbirth and child-care. A baby experiences:

When angels sing… June 4, 2010

Happy to present you another beautiful piece of singing by my beloved sisiter Tatiana:

Isn’t she an agel?…

LOVE; axinia

How to know you are doing “the right thing”? March 24, 2010

When you are working and you don’t feel you are “working”

When you are in relationship/marriage and don’t feel you are “working out something, building relationship”

When you percept anything you do as a natural flow, an enjoyment, a simple and easy thing

THEN

know that you are “in the right thing”.

What men really love about women March 9, 2010

Since years I have been interviewing men who seemed to be in happy relationships about the secret of their choice. “Why that woman? What does she give you?”… And you know there is a pretty common answer which I keep receiving from  males of various cultural and social backgrounds.

There is one word which they all mean: inspiration. “She inspires me: She awakens my desire to live, to create, to move, to achieve….”

We are the INSPIRATION….amazing, isn’t it? Just think that this is probably the core of Femininity…

Here is what a saint says about Inspiration:

Men’s day: a tribute to my father February 23, 2010

Today they celebrate the so-called “Men’s day” in Russia. Officially, as the name Defender of the Fatherland Day suggests, the holiday celebrates people who are serving or were serving the Russian Armed Forces (both men and women), but unofficially, nationally it has also more recently come to include the celebration of men as a whole, and to act as a counterpart of International Women’s Day on March 8.

I feel it’s a good occasion to say a few warm words about my father who is an amazing person. A father’s role in a girl’s upbringing is often underestimated. In reality a father is crucial, for he serves a model of male virtues and behaviour, motivates and fascinates… I have always been a “dad’s daughter”, I took after him not only in my appearance but also a lot in my character, attitude to life and values.

I had a great luck with a father who gave me high standards of human values such as idealism, honesty, intelligence, balance, trust to people, positivity, responsibility, discipline and honour. My father was born 1949 and belonged to the generation that dreamt of becoming cosmonauts (space men) and candidly believed in the glory of Communism. He became a paratrooper, man of airborne troops and served till the rank of colonel. He was a true officer at heart, dedicated and noble in an old-fashioned manner. He served 2 years in Afghanistan war at 80-s and later on graduated from the Frunze Military Academy (for post-graduates military) in Moscow with a degree in Military Analytics and Strategy. Well, he made a good career and has had an interesting life.

Who needs an extra dose of oxytocin? February 19, 2010

 

Another interesting discovery helps us to realize that the roots of many problems may totally differ from our ideas about them.

If you dislike most people you meet, it may simply lay in… the lack of oxytocin! Check out what a study says:

“A chemical best known for cementing the bond between a mother and her newborn child could also play a part in social behaviour. A new study shows that men and women who inhale a whiff of the hormone oxytocin rate strangers as more attractive.

When oxytocin courses through our blood, “we are more likely to see people we don’t know in a more positive light,” says Angeliki Theodoridou, a psychologist at the University of Bristol, UK, who led the new study.This effect adds to the hormone’s known role in human relationships. One study found that oxytocin levels spike after new mothers look at or touch their newborns and may help bonding.

Other work has hinted at the importance of oxytocin in social situations between adults too. People administered the hormone make overly generous offers in an economic game that measures trust, while men who got a dose of oxytocin proved better at remembering the faces of strangers a day later, compared to subjects who got a placebo.

In the latest trial, Theodoridou’s team tested 96 men and women in a double-blind placebo-controlled trial. After participants got either a spritz of oxytocin or a placebo, they rated pictures of 48 men and women for attractiveness and 30 for trustworthiness.

How to handle the tremendous power of romantic love? February 12, 2010

As many of you have learned from my earlier posts on the awesome book of Robert A. Johnson “Understanding the psychology of Romantic Love” (here and here), romantic love however attractive and delightful it may occur, brings more destruction than happiness.  Romantic love being the single greatest energy system in the Western psyche, is a tremendous power that attracts. If we can learn how to use it in a constructive, not a destructive way… may be the make up of the modern Western society can change for the better!

Let’s see the Johnson’s implications on the channeling of romantic love, please enjoy the way the author is unfolding it, so beautifully and truly:

 Romantic love is a spiritual power

“Romantic love is one of these truly overwhelming psychological phenomena that have appeared in Western history. It has overwhelmed our collective psyche and permanently altered our view of the world. As a society, we have not yet learned to handle the tremendous power of romantic love. We turn it into tragedy and alienation more often than into enduring human relationships. But, I believe, if men and women will understand the psychological dynamics behind romantic love and learn to handle them consciously, they will find a  new possibility of relationship, both to themselves and to others.

When we “fall in love” we feel completed, as though a missing part of ourselves has been returened to us; we feel uplifted, as though we were suddenly raised above the level of the ordinary world. Life has an intensity, a glory, an ecstasy and transcendence.

We seek in romantic love to be possessed by our love, to soar to the heights, to find ultimate meaning and fulfillment in our beloved. We seek the feeling of wholeness.

If we ask where else we have looked for these things, there is an answer:

The play of Male and Female February 10, 2010

This is an incredibly beautiful and profound poem from the Hindu Tradition of Advaita (non-dualism), by Jnanadev (1275 – 1296). I love the way it shows the play between the male and female elements in the Universe…

I offer obeisance to the God and Goddess,
The limitless primal parents of the universe.

They are not entirely the same,
Nor are they not the same.
We cannot say exactly what they are.

How sweet is their union!
The whole world is too small to contain them,
Yet they live happily in the smallest particle.

These two are the only ones
Who dwell in this home called the universe.
When the Master of the house sleeps,
The Mistress stays awake,
And performs the functions of both.

When He awakes, the whole house disappears,
And nothing at all is left.

Two lutes: one note.
Two flowers: one fragrance.
Two lamps: one light.

Two lips: one word.
Two eyes: one sight.
These two: one universe.