1000 petals by axinia

the only truth I know is my own experience

POLL: What to do with elderly people? November 27, 2009

The world population, at leat in the West, is growing old. And it is not only an economical problem of paying rents in some future, but also a problem of attitude towards the elderly (under this term I mean people over 70, in developed countries). Since my father is 60 now I can see he is far too healthy and dynamic to call him elderly, so I think it is 70 when a person is getting weak and needs more support. The age may vary from country to country though.

Since ages the elderly had been respected and taken care of. That was one of the basic laws of live. Presently I can see a huge shift in the attitude of a younger generation.

1. Due to the new technologies which young people are so good at, there is a huge gap between those who use them and those who are not. It is like living on another planet, literally. Any knowledge/information is so easily accessible that we don’t need many years to learn things. Often a short Internet check gives loads of information and a good insight into a subject. Basically there is an illusive  feeling they can’t lean anything from the elderly and there is no interest in communication on the side of younger generations. As for human relations, some aging people are indeed become wiser, and some grow into frustrated, moaning persons who are not inspiring to take after…

2. Taking care of old parents/relatives is being shifted towards some services and home for elderly. It is not any more common (at least in Europe) to nurse them at home till their last breath. For many people it seems to be a good solution to pay somebody else for taking care of their weak parents. In fact, that shocked me when I first learned about this new trend, coming from Russia to Austria 12 years back. That is how they depict it in a US source: “Few people gleefully anticipate the task of caring for an aging parent—but plenty seem to deny that it’s coming. Sooner or later, avoidance can thrust adult children into the caregiver role with a shotgun start. A parent’s slip in the bathroom or a collision caused by a mistake in the driver’s seat can precipitate a deluge of anguished decisions and rapid changes you’re not ready to handle. Suddenly, you could be scrambling to locate account numbers to pay Mom’s bills while she’s in the hospital, tangling with her insurance company to figure out why coverage for an X-ray was denied, and consulting with your brother—who lives three states away—about getting Mom into an assisted-living facility. You grapple with guilt because your mother never wanted to move out of her home, but now her condition leaves little choice. As the drama plays out, you’re also trying to stay afloat at work and look after your other dependents, the kids.”

I don’t really know any solution for this problem, especially on a global level. I feel it would be good if the elderly (whose who are not too weak to stay inside) would be more integrated into the modern life. I wonder what you think of it?

And what do you think we can do about it?

 thanks, and check this post soon again for the analysis of the poll results!

P.S: some links on the topic that may be interesting: Living with the Elderly.

LOVE; axinia

(image by me)

 

22 Responses to “POLL: What to do with elderly people?”

  1. I think this is another “problem” that’s overplayed by the globalist scoundrels to deliberately pull down the civilised world to the lowly levels of the semi-civilised places, Axinia 😐

    I don’t quite think the world population (even in the developed world) is exactly growing old. It’s a transitory phase to a more civilised and less overpopulated world. That’s because civilised people don’t breed as much as the uncouth hordes that inhabit the primitive parts of the world, and modern medical care in the civilised world enables people to live longer.

    This is the only logical and natural way to reduce the world population – become civilised, breed less and live longer. However, the globalist scoundrels are not interested in this. All they want is to destroy the civilisation of the First World and reduce it to the level of the primitive places in the world. Such uncouth places are (over)populated by hordes and hordes of semi-civilised people who breed like rats and have a barbaric, mediaeval “culture”. Such people don’t have it in their primitive “culture” to civilise themselves, so they try to destroy the civilised world instead.

    These uncouth, rapidly overbreeding mediaeval hordes are the greatest threat to human civilisation and the world, since their own primitive places cannot support an exploding population. Civilised places should be wary of letting in the uncouth hordes en masse. All the hard work done by the people of civilised societies will be undone in an instant by allowing mass migration from the semi-civilised places. Civilised societies work and innovate to lead better and more fulfilling lives, while the semi-civilised hordes keep breeding like rats, adding more and more hungry mouths, though their places are already bursting at the seams with an exploding population.

    Europe, North America and Australia should be wary of the globalist scoundrels’ plans to destroy their civilised societies and way of life by allowing mass migration from the lowly Third World. These civilised societies should take a leaf out of the books of Japan and South Korea, two other First World countries that have a supposedly aging population, yet don’t allow mass migration from the Third World. They have instead used automation and other advanced technologies to make sure a reducing population does not affect their economic output. That’s how it should be, instead of letting the rapidly overbreeding hordes from semi-civilised places to migrate en masse and destroy the civilised places with their uncouth “culture”.

    I think you must be surprised by such a comment from me, Axinia, as it sounds like something straight out of the Freiheitliche Partei Österreichs or the Bündnis Zukunft Österreich 😉

    🙂

  2. Deepa Mahajan Says:

    Dear Alien Earthling,
    What according to you is an uncouth, uncivilized human being ? And who according to you is civilized?
    Besides which soul wants to be born in the so-called civilized west?They all try and get born in so called third world countries where the spiritual aspect of a person gets more importance than his material.
    World population has increased as this is resurrection time where all get their last chance before selection of species starts and the useless ones for evolving are thrown out of evolution. This is the Last Judgement. After the sorting out, the population ,in the new evolution will again balance itself.

    • I’m very sorry Deepa, but I don’t subscribe to your theory of classifying the world into a “spiritual” Third World and a “materialistic” First World. I consider only the civilisational scale, using which some societies can be classified as less civilised, while others are more civilised.

      Using the word “spiritual” in association with the Third World is a nice attempt to cover up the lack of civilisation in such places, but it’s quite obvious to any neutral observer. Civilisation does not mean wealth, so the question of “materialism” and “spirituality” does not arise. For all the saints and sages and spirituality that we claim India is steeped in, it remains a very uncouth, semi-civilised country on the whole. I know it would be very hard for one to digest, but it’s a painful truth.

      Besides which soul wants to be born in the so-called civilized west?They all try and get born in so called third world countries…

      Could you explain why millions of souls flee the so-called “spiritual” third world countries every year, please? And why movement in the reverse direction is only a handful?

      Is it because millions of souls who wanted to be born in the semi-civilised third world realised that they were tricked into believing the third world is a “spiritual” place while in reality, it is an uncouth place and therefore decide to flee it 😕

      As for the world population, it’s fairly simple. As societies civilise themselves, their breeding rates come down steadily and at some point, their population begins to drop. This is more than offset by the semi-civilised hordes belonging to uncouth societies that breed at an alarming rate, leading to world population exploding as a whole.

      🙂

  3. Deepa Mahajan Says:

    Yes as I become a senior citizen,I feel that the older people should be mentally young. They should be able to keep up with all ages. If one is young at heart then people do meet you. One should be open to change and also advise but then step back and let them work out things for themselves.
    As one grows older a person’s faculties become slow. My father is 90 and now is very set in a routine and gets upset when he has to change that routine. Also I find that putting a new idea to them has to be done very slowly and gradually and the first reaction is normally a firm no and resistance. But again put it to them and slowly over time they start accepting.
    Old people also have memory and recollection problems. In our fast paced life they are good because they are slow they slow one down and allow one to apply brakes.
    In India many children of aged parents who live abroad have a deep guilt that they cant look after their parents who gave them unconditional love. But many old people don’t want to live with children where they feel restricted, and also that they are troubling their children. After all they were their own boss in their house. So many children have relocated the parents to an apartment system where it is an old people’s home where they have their own apartment but have all facilities like a walkway, a club, doctor on call and maid and nurse is provided. Though it is not the same they can be at least be comfortable with the fact that there is someone to look after them.
    One needs a lot of patience with old parents.

  4. I feel the blame goes to the parents itself and not the younger generation for bringing them up like this. Children imitate the parents from birth. From child hood if parents shower them with love affection care TIME then this situation would not have happened.

    In todays world , who has time for their children ? Both parents work and leave the children to some care center, some baby sitter and try to create their own world. The childrens after growing up just replicate what they have been taught from childhood.

    If you spend all your time with children, give them full support love TIME etc then I am sure even if parents tell their children to go away, they would not leave the elderly because of the affection and closeness.

    • axinia Says:

      great point, my friend. I think it is very true…
      For example my mom was taking care of me till I was 5, and in generally she is what I call a typical loving and caring mother – and I just cannot imagine to put her somewhere for other people to take care of her (thanks got she is very young still). My sister and me, we want to take care of our parents ourselves, and live all together!

      • That is really good. Same here, we all stay together and I cannot imagine staying separately. Though sometimes fight do happen and I wish I was staying alone. But its only for a moment. My wife has left her job and is managing the house full time so that she can give her full attention to our 2 year old. And the moments we spend with him is just not explainable. Would not miss that for anything in the whole world!

  5. swaps Says:

    I grew up to look up at elders as fountain heads of love. They made our childhood the best times of our lives. In short, they make the family picture postcard perfect!

    But today, our relentless quest for prosperity is taking us far from them and when we happen to be near, we are apt to rue the economic burden posed by a burgeoning old population.

    En route to our rightful place of a top economy, out parents and grandparents have made a swift ‘progress’ from fountain heads of love to economic burden. SIGH.

  6. swaps Says:

    I found this story very relevant to this topic:
    http://laghukatha0shortstories.wordpress.com/2009/04/07/love-and-life/

    Please read 🙂

  7. axinia Says:

    Unfortunatly this topic was not picked up actively, altought this is an issue which everyone will face sooner or later.

    Here are the alnswers (only 9 people participated!)
    Answers:

    Are you in contact with elderly people over 70?

    -I like to meet elderly people because they have much to tell about their life expeirences, it’s interesting 44%

    -only with those who are my relatives 33%

    -no, I don’t know anyone 22%

    -I know some but I never really communicate with them 0 0%

    -I have no idea how to spend time with people over 70 0 0%

    -I’d like to teach them Internet
    —————-

    What should we do with elderly people?

    -bring old and young together through various activities so that the young generation can learn form elders some wisdom (please name what kind of acivities it could be!) 44%

    -make them learn all the new things like Internet and let them take part in the bubbling online life 22%

    -every person shall take care of his/her parents and nurse them at home 22%

    -put them in assisted-living facility where they can live all toghether and enjoy each other’s company 11%

  8. Deepa Mahajan Says:

    That was nice Axinia, the poll. Yes, I agree with you about never letting anyone care of your Mother. Each of us face our own unique situations. Many children live away from their parents in other parts of the world or cities. In such situations they have to see that some good Samaritans attend to them. If one can afford it then many get nurses and maids/males to look after them for their daily needs, but it is never the same. As many old people because of being immobile and unable to do things for themselves get frustrated and become very difficult. If it is trying for one’s close ones then an outsider may not have the patience also. But then again, close ones get too impatient perhaps out of concern and love, and outsiders can be more kind.

  9. swaps Says:

    I am beginning to think of ‘vanaprasta’ as the best option if only some forests or peaceful secluded places remain.

  10. Ldinka_108 Says:

    the problem of relationship between parents and kids is as old as this world (remember, Russian classics – Fathers and Kids?). i personally believe that healthy interactions are mutually beneficial. young people gain wisdom and patience from elder ones. elder ones feel needed when could provide youngsters with the wisdom and love and patience. it is ideal. of course, neglect is cruel as with the age people get physically limited. i think, wise nature planned everything ideally for us – we are collective creatures, so we have to interact to support each other. but…
    in reality, anything is good if there is a balance. many times, actually, big times, i see problems arise when people haven’t won “the parent lottery”. in this case, even little interaction might be too much. the most serious and painful lessons we get from the people to whom we are close to by blood or by marriage… those lessons provide THE most serious spiritual growth if one is ready for it 🙂 i believe in those cases the distance is as needed as a sip of the the fresh air or opportunity to retrieve and recharge before the next session :-).
    for me, it is always been a puzzle how souls pick their potential parents. i understand that those are karmic connection, but sometimes it looks really absurd at he first glance. there must be deeper reasons for such matches. just one more reason to introspect, i guess 🙂

  11. Nita Says:

    Axinia, I have not read all the comments but my own opinion on this is that the elderly should be as independent as possible because I firmly believe that living with the children is not so rosy. For example, as I grow older, I will not like to live with my daughters. I want to lead my own life and for that I will maintain my good health. However for those who are not healthy I think the grown up children should take care of them somehow, but how they do it, is upto them. They should do it with kindness and respect.
    I know it is a source of conflict for those who live on different continents and even in India we have seen this. Maybe my daughters too will go away to another country, I don’t know. I never want to clip their wings. There are parents who tell their children not to go, to stay back for them. I cannot tell my children that.


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