1000 petals by axinia

the only truth I know is my own experience

What is the difference between “falling in love” and “love”? November 15, 2008

Waterfall or the ocean?

I like the English expression “falling in love” because it very well explains what happens  – people do “fall” in love (just the opposite of growing into). Love, when we fall into it seem to be more intense, powerful, sparkling and also painful – the great play of hormones that make us druggy… oh, how people love it! Surely this kind of fireworks of feelings is a rich material for arts and discussions, that is why it has been cultivated throughout centuries, especially in the Western world.

And yet I would claim that this is not love.

Love is the something that grows into infinity, something so deep and steady, so alive and majestic, so flowing and playful…

I would compare falling in love with the waterfall, which is exiting and fascinating, but you jump into it and  -most probably -get injured or die. Or land into a quiet waters which bores you. 

I would compare the true LOVE with the ocean, so vast and powerful, so dignified and all-perwading. You can swim or ride the waves, you can dive or lay down on it – you are always inside the ocean, that is nourishing and caring unconditionally…

And how do you see it?

LOVE, axinia


24 Responses to “What is the difference between “falling in love” and “love”?”

  1. Valusha Says:

    A great explanation. And nothing to add 😉

  2. Sahaja Says:

    Wonderful comparision….I agree also 🙂

    may be i will come back to this post if I can express what I think 🙂

  3. vinayakah Says:

    ah, beautifull post Ax!

    There are many words we use, and dont really know exactly, what does it mean…. You know how I see it myself already by reading my post 😉 This is what I really think!

    I better become the drop in the ocean than a waterfall diver 🙂

  4. swaps Says:

    Like God, it is indefinable. Each one forms his/her opinion.
    But one must not look at it as suffering….then you can be sure you are not ‘giving’ but ‘seeking’. And the later is not love.

  5. swaps Says:

    On our journey to the infinite ocean, we must endure some waterfalls 🙂

  6. axinia Says:

    @swaps, your first comments was not clear, sorry.

    the second one is better 🙂 – yes, we do pass the waterfalls, all of us do.
    But the point is not to stuck in that, and find the way to the ocean. Don`t you agree?

  7. axinia Says:

    may I ask you please do not call me “Ax”? It is not what my name is, and it sounds actually very hard to me – I do not feel comfortable with that.
    There is a shortening for Axinia in Russian which is very, very sweet – but unfortunately not suitable for foreigners (as you now Russsian, you may guess the name 🙂 You can call me that if you want…

    and yes, a drop in the ocean – is probaly the most lissful state. but it takes time for us to realise that. The power of the waterfall is often too attractive!

  8. vinayakah Says:

    thank you Axinia for telling me, now I know! I wouldnt like you to feel uncomfortable. 🙂

    I guess, the name could be Alexandra, or Sasha (may be) ? 😉

    yes, the drop in the ocean, a dream of ages… what else to say if only, let it happen 🙂

  9. axinia Says:

    in fact, the shortening is “ksiusha”, which is normally difficult for a foreginer to pronounce 🙂

  10. vinayakah Says:

    nice name, really!! 🙂 I think, I can pronounce it without any problem 😉 Thanks again, for letting me know!

  11. swaps Says:

    Axinia, I have a cold which gets worse when I try to understand my first comment…really 😦

    I want to add that I think of love as ‘a spontaneous urge to hug’. (Pretty dangerous view,eh? 🙂

    Right now I know of only one love that fits your definition – parents’ love ….

    “Tu pyar ka sagar hai
    Jiski ek boondh ki pyase hum”

    (You are an ocean of love
    We thirst for a drop of it)

    Watch it here:

    …Long live Hindustani!!

  12. axinia Says:

    come on, my friend!! ONLY parential???
    Actually this is the description of love I feel towards EVERYONE (or at least people to whom I somehow in contact) – my family, friends, colleagues, my readres, really everyone around!

    And as for that “I want to add that I think of love as ‘a spontaneous urge to hug’. (Pretty dangerous view,eh? ” – I dont see anything wrong with that. It can be taken wrong, yes – but a hug is indeed a great manifestation of love!

  13. kanagu Says:

    Nice post on love Axinia.. It won’t get stagnated.. and you rightly compared it to ocean and waterfall..

  14. axinia Says:

    thank you, kanagu 🙂

  15. sunshineforlife Says:

    these are beautiful thoughts, Axinia.

    btw, just sharing some love here. 🙂 wish you all the best always. —


  16. Scietech Says:

    I see no difference between falling in love and love 😐 Since love does not exist everywhere just like that, one has to fall in love with something in order to love it 😐

  17. Diffio Says:

    So wonderful explanation. Agree with you. I really liked the comparison of “falling in love” and “waterfall” because it reminds me a story from my life 😉

  18. axinia Says:

    Diffo, thanks! I am sure it was a good story.
    You know, I think, we expierince something in order make it a good story later 🙂

  19. Atlantic Says:

    Debby, the type of love being studied in these statistics is based on physical and sexual attraction. This is the type that Axinia refers to as a waterfall and actually not true love at all. The study concludes “There is ample evidence that men do not love one woman forever.” Since his feelings are based mainly on physical attraction then it should come as no surprise that the relationship should end. But as our friend above rightly points out, this is not love. “Fire works don’t continue and 50% of marriages end in divorce. Affection keeps the other 50% together.” I wonder… did it ever occur to the writer that some of those couples showing the “affection” might actually have the true form of love??


  20. Atlantic Says:

    Thanks Axinia! You know… It’s always nice to be pointed back by your readers to some of your old posts. I’ve never had the chance to read this one, and I liked it very much. Very beautiful thoughts!

  21. axinia Says:

    Atlantinc, ti’s so true…I have forgotten
    about this post compeltely! And with a great surprise I discover now in what a simple way it explains the true love… Even Robert A. Johnson could not do it so clearly :))))

  22. kush Says:

    These are beautiful thoughts, Axinia,about eternal all pervading Love you are experiencing which is actually GOD-The Truth

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