1000 petals by axinia

the only truth I know is my own experience

Facing lots of problems I feel life is getting better! November 29, 2007


photo by axinia

Another interesting thing I noticed and wanted to share with you.

Recently several people approached me with quite heavy problems (family situations, health or papers). It is not unusual, I love to help and people know it. Unusual is that I have got so many calls for help in a very short time. What could it mean?

Seeing that much suffering around I could have get much depressed. But the opposite is the case! In fact, I have a strong feeling that things are getting better… I have a feeling that so much can be done and there is such a potential for the solutions! Luckily things are getting better with my old and new friends, but also not straight away. Interestingly most of these improvements are connected with the spiritual development of these people. May be the problems come up because people have to meet their spiritual self?.. (more…)


A person without any past November 26, 2007

Filed under: geography,innocence,personal,spirituality,thoughts,women,world — axinia @ 9:15 pm


There is one very strange thing about my life that keeps repeating again and again: my past disappears till the point of destruction or dissolving and there is no way I can keep it or catch it…

In my school time I went to 3 different schools – none of them is existing any more. At all. In fact none of the places I lived as a child exist (I mean the place is there, but there is no state units like I used to live in). I can not come back to any of my schools and meet the teachers and thank them. I can not see the old walls…I am not sure that the building even exist…Thanks to Internet I have found 2-3 schoolmates, but this is almost nothing. Typical destiny of a child with the soviet military background – we just spread everywhere.

Also in my adult life many realtionships´that used to be intensive just dissolve in the air when over (for any reason like the change of place, job, family situation) – especially the ones that have not been easy. (more…)


The artists of the Generation S November 21, 2007


painting by Konstantin Sterkhov

In the modern times when everything is moving very fast, it is very difficult for a single person to achieve anything without compromising with the trend of the world. Hence, it is absolutley essential that those artists who seek freedom and who believe that they have to play a vital role to further the cause of art, should give up their petty differences and jealousies and unite together. (more…)


Positive thinking? No, thank you! November 20, 2007

 photo by axinia

 I am probably one of the most positive people you have ever met (even being able to claim that is a sign, isn`t it). In fact I think positive all the time and it is difficult for me to see a problem somewhere where most of the people see it.

However I am not following the religion of positive thinking, and I will tell you why.

There are situation where positive thinking can even harm – in a way of hiding the true picture of the issue. Cerulo, a professor at Rutgers University, wrote a book last year called Never Saw It Coming. She points out that medical workers and computer technicians—the professional troubleshooters of the world—keep our bodies and mainframes running by being paragons of pessimism. When doctors and IT workers take up a case, they begin by dispassionately assuming the worst and then move up from there. Their protocols demand precise and evolving definitions of the most severe maladies and malfunctions, while they tend to have fuzzy and almost absentminded definitions of health, well-being, and normal function. Facing a problem helps more that just being positive about it!

Since much is being spoken about positive thinking, one recent American study has shown some interesting results on the topic.

A patient’s positive or negative emotional state has no direct or indirect effect on cancer survival or disease progression, according to a large-scale new study. Published in the December 1, 2007 issue of CANCER, a peer-reviewed journal of the American Cancer Society, the study found that emotional well-being was not an independent factor affecting the prognosis of head and neck cancers.

So why am I, myself being a positive thinking person oppose it so persistently? For the same reason that I oppose many psychological methods and techniques – for the “unnatural” nature of them!

I believe that the positivity is something that comes from within, and it can not  – and should not! – be trained. Positive thinking can be taught, no doubt. But isn`t it strange when people “try to think positive”? Whatever one does on purpose does not really work in a proper way. One has to be authentic. Natural. Innocent like a child… Then everything works.

You BECOME positive when you touch your deeper SELF.

When the true beauty of your nature reveals through every cell of your body, every movement of your soul, every sparkle of your thought.


LOVE, axinia

Pelevant posts:

The mind games or the myth of self-improvement

Spirituality on sale

3 questions about YOUR spiritual practice



The essence of Sahaja Meditation November 18, 2007

 photo by axinia

“How to do meditation, many people ask. Don’t do anything, just go into thoughtless awareness. Try to go to the thoughtless awareness. If you can get into that condition of thoughtless awareness, you can do your job because that’s the point where you are with the truth, with the reality, with the joy. … If you are in thoughtless awareness, what happens to you is that you get the confidence, complete confidence of divinity. You know you have it. …
It’s very important to become thoughtlessly aware because then there are no thoughts coming from the left or the right, from the past or the future. Just in the present you are there. (more…)


Austria is like a painting November 14, 2007

Filed under: geography,joy,love,personal,thoughts,Travel,world — axinia @ 11:17 pm

 photo by axinia

It is not a picture of a painting –  I took this landscape photo on one of my last walks around Vienna, the capital of Austria.

Austria has been always fascinating me with its almost unreal, picturesque beauty: the nature itself seem to be somehow surreally perfect, as if made by some Vienna Opera setup master… The only country that seem to be more beautiful and more perfect to me is the Austrian neighbour, Switzerland.

The country of Mozart and Maria-Theresa (both absolutely exceptional personalities in the human history) gives a feeling of high comfort and beauty, balance and peace. Perfection without tension. Enjoyment without excitement. Like a cosy blanket.

Just come and see for yourself!

LOVE, axinia


What is wrong with living together and not getting married November 12, 2007

Filed under: innocence,joy,love,thoughts,women,world — axinia @ 9:25 pm

 photo by axinia

The modern trend of living together in a so called cohabitation or civil marriage has been recently taking over not only the majority of the Western countries but also of Eastern Europe and Russia.

I have been suspecting something wrong with that phenomenon but could not really explain why. You probably know this feeling: you are sure something is wrong, but a simple explanation (because it is not traditional, not natural or not successful) does not work with the modern civilised humans.

Recently I came across some studies giving the scientific proof and logical explanation for the unhealthy nature of that state of illegal cohabitation (yes, actually it IS illegal – simply because it is no “by law”).

More than 50 percent of American couples cohabit, and those who later marry are more likely to divorce (more…)


The only thing that really makes me sad… November 7, 2007


photo by axinia

Sadness is not my friend. In fact, it is very seldom that I can be affected by that strange mood. However there is one thing that really makes me sad. One thing that lays at the core of all the human problems, I think. One thing that is well known and that is mostly taken as it is, as a natural and unavoidable: the lack of love.

One person calls another stupid and refuses to talk – for some ego-driven reason.

Another one takes something too personal and feels hurt.

The third one says: we are not here to love each other, but to work.

Sounds familiar? I bet it happens everywhere and any time. (more…)


The Fire, The Water and The Copper Trumpets November 6, 2007

 photo by axinia

The deep wisdom of the legends and fairy-tails from all over the world keeps fascinating me.

One Russian fairy-tale called “The Fire, The Water and The Copper Trumpets” tells about 3 great tests a hero should undergo in order to reach his goal (marry a beautiful princess, of course!). 3 kinds of tests reflect 3 main problems we normally face in our personal development.

The water: all kinds of troubles of our emotional self. Depressions, doubts, our past, unfulfilled desires… All that heavy and sticky stuff (labeled as “the left-side” in the yogis terminology).

The Fire: all our action (mental and physical), stress, over-activity, anger, excessive planning and pushing, aggression towards others… All that hot and hard stuff (labeled as “the right side” in the yogic terminology).

As soon as we overcome all that and become a balanced, peaceful and pleasant personality – here comes the best part! (more…)


I love the Autumn time! November 5, 2007

Filed under: innocence,joy,love,personal,thoughts,world — axinia @ 10:20 am


photo by axinia

I wrote already one post some time ago about the incredible beauty and special feeling of the Autumn season. But I just can not keep myself from sharing with you that joy and beauty I experienced on my last photo-shooting-haunt in the Viennese Forests…

Yes, and one more thing I realised why I love it: it has COLOURS!!!!!!! The European nature is mostly green and rather plain – I miss red, yellow and pink a lot! That is why when the autumn comes me heart enjoys it so much. Truly golden, magic time…

LOVE, axinia


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