1000 petals by axinia

the only truth I know is my own experience

How to get on easy with everyone February 28, 2007

 photo phitar

Today I want to share with you one of my best communication tricks.

But first you should know that whatever tricks I am using, it is all authentic, coming from my own self and not being learned or trained. It took me some time to realise that these are actually tricks :).

My best communication trick works on the basic human quality described here. I guess, it will not work without it!


When you meet a person, just see her/him as a child!

When you address a person, address a child in her/him.

Of cause you should not speak to a person, as you would speak to a child, but deep within you just keep this feeling of being children on the same playground.


Addressing a child in a person, you switch on the most powerful element in us – the innocence. It is the root of every human being, and even if it is covered with all sorts of stupid things, it is still there!

Innocence works like a magnet – we all know that animals are very innocent and they act according to the magnet field of the Earth. So does our innocence, it acts like a magnet and it attracts the innocence in others to us.

I was happy to find out that this trick works with somebody else as well: a colleague of mine, a successful oil trader who is on good terms with the half of the world and one of the best communicators I know told me once that he sees all people as his classmates. That is his trick for successful negotiation – and he is just great in it!

And what I really like about it is that you are absolutely safe and comfortable in every communication – the roughest person calms down and the most arrogant one humbles down…

It can be your boss, a prime minister or a queen – when you see a child in a person, you are on the same level and they accept it!

LOVE, axinia


15 Responses to “How to get on easy with everyone”

  1. lea Says:

    This suggestion of thinking of the person in terms of that childlike nature within in us all is just sublime. Pure genius! A truth hidden in plain sight. I am officially hooked on your blog! Congratulations!

  2. Dmitra Says:

    When I was 16, I had written an issue on this subject, that I felt loosing several good traits of behavior while becoming adult.

  3. Ramya Says:

    Axinia, this is what I meant when I said, pure at heart!!

  4. odzer Says:

    I do not really like kids, can’t stand them infact. Anyway why is it important to get along with everyone? We are not here to please other people, do as you please and be happy with yourself that is far more important! There is a great penalty to pay if you try to please others and that is the loss of your true self! Everything exists for a reason even arrogance. Things that are overly sugar coated or things that seem harmonious are often the roots of a lot of problems. As an example one of my friends went to a weekend with his office colleagues on a “team building exercise” but he would rather have stayed at home and spent the time lazying around in the end he ends up being more bitter about his colleagues because he spent time there against his wishes. Its better to appear non co-operative and unfriendly then try to “adjust” with people in my opinion if that is your true nature.

  5. axinia Says:

    Ramya, thank you, very good point.

    thanks for your thoughts. but getting on well with everyone is not about pleasing!! It is about feeling happy from the joefuly communicaton. May be it is the matter of a character, but I tought it is so natural and desirable by everyone…

  6. Mavin Says:

    You have displayed deep insight on human behaviour and this is rarely seen.

    For this behaviour to become natural on our part, it is important that we are at peace with ourselves within. This is automatically reflected when we interact with the outside world.

    It becomes effortless and natural.

  7. wortman Says:

    Sehr interessante Sichtweise. Den Gegenüber als “Kind” zu sehen und entsprechend den Worten, seiner Mimik und Gestik interpretieren um eine erfolgreiche Diskussion zu führen. Egal in welcher Hinsicht.

    Axinia, hab ich das so richtig verstanden? Mein Englisch ist ja nicht so ganz berauschend 😉

  8. amzolt Says:

    Totally amazing yet oh, so practical !!!

    I shared this on FriendFeed and Twitter…

    Now, I need to send it to all my close friends!! And, post it on my new forum!!!

    ~ Alex from Our Evolution

  9. axinia Says:

    @Mavin, you are wise as ever. thanks!

    @wortman – fast richtig 🙂 Es ist noch einfacher – du siehst in dem Genenüber ein Kind, und – bitte! – nichts interpretieren, einfach genießen und spielen, wie in der Sandkiste 🙂

    @Alex, I am glad this post has found your high appreciaton, many thanks for its promotion! Hope, the idea of this post will inspire some people to see the communication in the different light…

  10. That is interesting…. what you say is right Axina, an aggressive, suspicious and dominating attitude doesn’t work at all… Before we get into an argument, we need to be in peace with ourselves… understand that the other person also has flesh and blood and feelings… Most of the time, there is misunderstanding because we see the other person as an enemy. In essence, i agree what you have written.

    “One smile can do what hundred wars cannot”

    Destination Infinity

  11. axinia Says:

    well said, Destination Infinity!
    I too noticed that mostly people tend to see the communication partner as as kind of an enemy, especially if it comes to negotiations…My example with the oil trader is especially interesting, because this guy is so succesful, and he sees the children in his counterparts. That turns the whole communicaiton into something else.
    My personal experince shows that by doing so i can establish a trustful relationship literary within seconds.

  12. Nova Says:

    I liked the idea Axinia. M gonna give it a try! 🙂

  13. wortman Says:

    aaah… now, i know what you mean 🙂

  14. tatushka55 Says:

    O_o O_o O_o O_o ooooooou
    I must try that,
    It must be amazing, I imagine talking with my boss like he is a child 😀

  15. Alian Says:

    Thanks for this blog great one. I was happy to find your work at flicker, and this photo of two girls is so full of sweetness! I notice that people go from photo links to the flicker site faster than from other links in the text – hope to be a good promotion for you.

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